But my christmas and new year haven't been fabulous, to be honest. I've only told Elaine, Hari, Daniel, Gabriel, Shaun and JJ so far, since I only got the news after getting back from China and had to leave for Korea almost immediately but yeah, I got accepted to the double degree course I applied for at ANU. You might just be like 'chey, it's just ANU' but yeah hey, you studied more than me the past four years. To me this wasn't such a sure success. Besides, I got in based on SATs alone so there.
In any case, that's unhappy thing number one, because my mom told me that although financially she can support me if she chooses to, she's still undecided because she thinks I'm not worth the money. Cos my attitude sucks or something. And for me it's worse because I myself don't know if I really want to study overseas. Of course, if my family were just slightly richer or never ran into that financial crisis those years ago, I wouldn't even think twice. But sadly that's not the case. The worst thing is I have to make a decision fast and in fact by now. Cos I have to tell BB if I'm joining Cheerobics. I guess for now I have no choice but to say I can't.
Secondly, my holiday with mom wasn't that fantastic. We still quarrelled, the ANU thing being one of the topics. I was sick and cold and I got no christmas wishes from anyone. Only Dan because I asked him to. And Shaun because I wished him. And Gab and some other unrecognisable number.
I wasn't invited to Daniel's birthday party, surprise surprise. Even if I were around I wouldn't have been. Gabriel didn't invite me to the combined party either. I'd very much like to say it's not the kind of party I'd go for anyway. But well yeah even Eunice went. I missed my friends so much.
And yeah we made special arrangements so I could rush back to Singapore in time to meet friends for countdown. But people were either at home or uncontactable, so I spent 12mn at home alone, on the phone with Gabriel and then Shaun. Yeah thanks for calling. (: And yeah I called Daniel but he pretty much hung up on me saying he had to go. So yeah talk about a warm welcome back from my friends! Haha.
I can't believe I actually thought I could've thrown a surprise party for Daniel. Who would've come, I don't even know if he would.
I guess I'm just saying all this while fighting any bitter feelings within me. Trying to stay happy for the new year. I'm probably just missing being with my lovely WXYZs. I can't help but be sure they remember us. I guess I'll drop Weiyi an SMS later.
China was good. Everything after sucked. But I'm gonna pick myself up for the new year.
So yeah, happy new year dears. (:
posted by jallyre @ 6:00 AM
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